HELP!!!!!!! PERSONAL STATEMENT

Okay, so I posted my essay on mychances.net, and the only criticism I have been getting is that my essay does not reveal ENOUGH about myself. I'm not entirely sure what that means...does it mean that I should include my academic/extracurricular history? or that it should show my values?

what does it meaaaan!? and how do i go about doing so?

That type of feedback is often indicative of essays that "tell" but don't "show" enough. Personal anecdotes are often very helpful here. (Note that I haven't read your essay so I can't be sure that this is your issue.)

www.essayforum.com/undergra...

there is my essay. if you could read it and give me some feedback that'd be great.

The link is broken.

Also, is there interest in having a setting that would allow you to set an essay within MyChances as being "publicly-visible"?

James, is there any way of implementing an option where you can choose whether you want number feedback or constructive criticism on an essay? I've wasted many credits on essay critiques that were only numbers. Thanks! P.S., this site is fantastic.

I want MyChances to become a great resource for essay feedback, so this is a serious issue to me. I want to solve the problem in a durable, positive way, so the fix will be more than just requiring that people enter some text. Details to come.

hm, i could just send it to you in a message if you'd like. but the essay I have now is far different from the one I posted on MyChances before, I cut out about 200 words and tried to add more about myself (as much as I could while keeping the mood of the essay).

And yes, I think it would be great to have an option to publicly show our essays. The only problem would be that the likelihood of someone plagiarizing but I guess that doesn't REALLY matter since there are so many applicants.

James,

You should figure out a way that someone can anonymously ask for further feedback on an essay. ie I get comments on an essay. I make edits and I would not mind getting more feedback from someone who has been helpful. It would be great if I then could post to feedback person #x and they could respond anonymously with feedback or just letting the person know that they do or do not want to help.

I also think you would get better feedback if someone could thank someone anonymously for the feedback. People would put more thought into what they say.

I agree with jimmydean. Sometimes, feedback needs further clarification, and sometimes you get attached to an essay and want to help out with further revisions.